Clouds in New Zealand!

We are getting into winter, and the foggy misty mornings are now commonplace here in Auckland.

Jono, is all his wisdom and expanse of the english language calls it clouds. Whenever it's a foggy morning and we are heading to school, he says "Mum Look! The clouds on the ground!"

I think it's lovely, he is finding his way to explain things in a fashion that we understand.

More recently, we had some Subway for dinner. I got a salad bowl, with hot teriyaki chicken. The top of the salad bowl has a clear lid, and once closed the steam from the hot chicken gathered very quickly at the top. 

Jono pipes up from the back ground. "Mum look, clouds your dinner!'

So cute!!

You NEED spices when cooking

Like... NNNEEEEEDD!!

Jono enjoys helping me cook, sometimes he listens to what I am saying and does what I asked and we have a lovely flavourful meal.

Often he will go and add spices when I am not looking - I may simply have my back turned for a moment, or be washing up, or talking to one of the other kids, but I have learned to only have a few spices out at a time, for a very short time - and then QUICKLY put them away!!

The other day I was cooking a chicken dish, frying it up int he pan, with onion, curry powder and some other spices in olive oil. I turned my back, and found my container of Curry powder was empty... and all in the pan!

I managed to drag out a lot of the excess, and ended up actually giving the chicken a light wash through in a strainer. It was still very tasty, and only slightly spicy.

One day, we will learn how to measure and taste while cooking ;)

What is this Daylight Savings?

Since daylight savings has finished here in New Zealand, we have noticed some distinct advantages, and some disadvantages.

The sun is now actually up in the mornings, instead of waking up to pitch black, which is a real plus, there is also some fantastic opportunities for moonlight photos...  :)




However, Jono has no idea that the time has changed... and as such, his body clock also hasn't changed.

Let's go through a typical morning.

6:30am - Alarm goes off
6:31am - Hit snooze
6:32am - Start dozing.
6:34am - Jono throws our bedroom door open, races in and deposits an animal on our bed.

If it's the dog, she races for our faces wagging her tail madly, while Jono pronounces "She so wiggalish!"

If it's a cat, they still come for the face demanding that we pat them / rescue them from the mad child that dragged them into the room.

After fending off whatever animal has arrived, and gaining full consciousness in moments,  Jono then asks loudly "Mum, can I watch TV?"

Now, we don't watch TV on a school day, so he is happy with that answer, but the whole sleep in opportunity has been destroyed... and he does this on a weekend as well!!!

I hope his body clock catches up to things soon, especially as we are about to be on holidays and a sleep in past 6:34am would be wonderful!

Sentence Structure

Jono is coming into his own with language at the moment, we are getting less babble and more real words. He is even thinking about his words, and the way they fit together to make sure they sound right.

A few weeks back, Rob was with Jono in the car heading towards home. There is a large amount of roadworks near our place as they are building a new motorway. As they got the that stretch of road jono turned to Rob and said "They...... they fixing the road". Rob turned around and said "yes Jono, they are fixing the road"


When Rob was explaining it to me, he added "I was so excited, I wanted to talk with Jono about it for hours."

It's amazing what an impact simple things can have on those around us :)

We hate Planes

Or so we thought...

so here we go, the story about the planes. Before moving to NZ, we decided it would be a good idea for me to at least come to the country once and see the land, the housing, the schooling, check out the teachers, and the special needs system. I'd spent 2 months researching on line, but it was time for some eyes on the ground.

In order to make the special needs case more evident, I was to take Jono with me. Rob was already in the country on business, I had arranged babysitting for the other two, and Jono and I were packed and ready.

We arrived at the airport, parked the car and checked in. We went through customs, got something to eat and went to the gate our plane was at. Jono was comfortable, relaxed and happy. We had been talking for weeks at home and at school with social stories, videos and pictures about going on the plane - and every time he said "I don't want to" We thought that he would be fine once he got on the plane, but we didn't realise just how much he really didn't want to get on it.

We walked down the airbridge, and turned the corner to the final section to walk onto the plane - around 20m worth... and it was enclosed with glass. The moment he saw the plane through the glass it was over.

He started to stress and panic, and stopped walking saying 'I don't want to'. He lost it, I lost it, I attempted to forcibly carry him on board, and it was unbelieveably overwhelming. I had every member of staff from the plane bring out everything they could to attempt to coax him on board and it was just not going to happen. I even rang Rob who was in NZ in a meeting and asked him to help talk Jono onto the plane.

20 minutes later - defeated, bawling, screaming, saying it wasn't fair (and that was just me) they unboarded our luggage and we exited the walkway. I took some time to calm down and assess the situation. Then started the phone calls - Grandma to babysit Jono, new ticket to get to Auckland, refund on unused tickets, madly drive home, re-pack, get Jono settled and get back to the airport in 4 hours for my next flight.

I arrived at 11:30 at night to a husband with flowers and a balloon. the next four days were intensely busy and we decided we would move countries.

The next trip across was the actual move, and we decided to take no chances with Jono and actually gave him some drugs to knock him out before getting on the plane, and board him on a wheelchair so he would not notice as much. The moment of the deep snores from his mouth 5 minutes before taking off was pure bliss for Rob and I. We got him on board, and then he woke up, after only 20 minutes of sleep, but he coped, and we all made it together.

The next flight was back to Australia for Christmas - again he didn't want to go on a plane, but we realised it wasn't the plane so much, it was being all together as a family that mattered - which compounded the problems for the first flight. We got some very light herbal lollies to help him relax, and that was all he needed.

The next flight, was heading back to NZ after the holiday, and he was happy - no herbal lollies, no drugs, and none of the I don't want a plane, just I'm going home to New Zealand, and I'm with my family.

We get him the wheelchair for each trip - as it anchors him, and is familiar now, but amazingly, he wasn't worried about the plane, just where his family was, and where his home was.

Now... if only he could have told us that in the beginning ;)

Mum, Look et dis!

We,ve been doing some rather major renovations of our house lately.. specifically building a pool in the backyard. I honestly didn't realize just how much mess and dirt and mud there was going to be. We've asked them to do some extra landscaping work while the excavator has been on site so I feel that every single part of the house has been trashed. *hums to self.. it's only temporary*

Co-incidentally Jono has been getting us a lot more involved in his world lately, he will call out for someone to look 'et dis' (at this) and point, sometimes we have no clue what he is looking at sometimes we can guess it, occasionally he will give a description, which often goes along the lines of 'mumble, jumble, gargle, wargle, TRUCK'. ahh... he saw a truck. Then we can ask questions like: What colour was it Jono? and he will answer, it's a white one.

We are up to 4-5 word sentences that are impromptu, structured by him and make sense. It's wonderful! So... back to the pool. This next part I'll be doing in pictures, as I simply cannot describe this.

Firstly, our yard kinda 'before' we started all this.















Next, our yard part way through the leveling of the land.















And... here's a mud puddle that grew in the corner.... Yes, that 'is' Jono walking near it to go to the swingset on the top terrace... no he didn't fall in it, on this day. However...
















One of the morning we were madly running to get out the door to school, all the kids were dressed, and I was getting the last things into their school bags so we could get out the door. Jono was in the backyard on the swing (which he loves) and I thought he would have no problems staying clean.

I told the kids, 2 minutes and we are leaving.. and the next thing I hear is a little voice at the back door "Mum, Look et dis" I can hear a grin in the voice so I go to check it out. I wasn't prepared. He had slipped and fallen in to the mud puddle, and was thrilled!! At first I raced him to the shower, then I stopped grabbed the camera and took photos with him laughing the whole time.


















I marched him back outside quickly for a few more photos. So I didn't have even more mud through the house. Daniel grabbed my phone and took some photos on there as well.
















Amazingly, we still made it to school on time!

Dance like you are 'unaware'

Many of us have heard the adage: "Work like you don't need the money, Love like you've never been hurt and dance like no-one is watching."

There are many forms of the quote these days, and it's hard to find the 'true' source, some attributing it to Irish Proverbs and Mark Twain. Regardless, the heart of the message is one I find inspirational... live for the now and don't allow yourself to be held back by others.

Recently I've been having a few discussions with people along these lines. We've talked about how people feel a 'pressure' to fit in, which can cause some of them to behave differently. The outcome of this is that many adults wonder who they are, and what happened on their life journey to become someone they are not.

For people with Autism the pressure to fit in may be a heavier weight than the rest of us. The humming, pacing and flapping that many Autistic children do is often frowned upon by society. I'm fairly certain that Jono is completely unaware of the looks we sometimes get from people when out at the park or at the shops... I notice it though.

He usually hums when moving, walking should somehow be accompanied by noise... wether it just 'feels' good, or it's now an ingrained habit I am unsure, but one thing I am sure of I is that as he goes on in life people will ask him what he is doing, make fun of him for doing it and at times demand him to stop. People will be people.

Currently his brother and sister will mimic him at times, and he gets annoyed with them. Which again I am unsure, it may be that he realises they are 'making fun' of him... or that he doesn't want someone else doing it becuase it is 'his'... or perhaps he doesn't like it being brought to his notice. Until they bring it up though, he is largely 'unaware' that he is doing it.

So where does the dancing come into this? My daughter will dance along to a song, and suddenly notice people are watching and get embarrased and stop. She tells me she is worried what other people will think of her. I tell her don't worry, because they are all worrying what other people will think of them.

It's a big lesson to learn, especially for one who is only 6 years old.. but I hope she gets it, I want all my kids to get it. This is one lesson Jonathan can teach all of us.


He doesn't hold back. He doesn't feel judged. He isn't aware of others looks, and he is just comfortable being himself.

This week in your life,
Dance... like you are 'unaware'.

Update: The day after I wrote this, I had a 'sleepover' at my Mum's place, helping her with something. I left my place around 7pm, wearing a trackpants, long shirt and a fluffy polar fleece dressing gown, as I knew we wouldn't go out anywhere. On the way home the next morning, I stopped at a petrol station... and 'almost' took off the dressing gown so I could appear more normal. Then I remembered this, and left it on because it was warmer, who cares what people think!! It was a good feeling :)

Happy Mothers Day! (did you bring a tissue?)

For all the Mums, New Mums, Older Mums, Multiple Mums, Adoptive Mums, Mums-to-be, Grandmums, and just the nice lady that all the kids call Mum... HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!

It's 6:30am here, and I'm the first one awake, I've grabbed my laptop and headed downstairs, it's quiet, the birds are in the backyard on the trampoline, the sun is just getting over the hills and the birdsong is ringing in my ears. I have a cuppa, a water, and am keen to get into my home gym and move my muscles. My children all wanted to sleep together last night so I have 3 kids in the one bedroom, mattresses on the floor and general chaos... they love it.

Yesterday I thought of getting gifts for my children to thank them for making me a mum, for it really has given me so much to be a Mum...to do a reverse Mothers' Day, I ran out of time but the sentiment is there, perhaps this post is my gift :)

My life before kids was a world of difference to what it is now. I have 3 children, which is enough a challenge in it's own right. I had then close together, around 22 months apart, so my oldest was five when the youngest was born, when you are at home, with no car and no friends nearby... this is also a challenge. My second child is Autistic, and yes of course this is a challenge.

Being a mother of a special needs child is definitely a greater challenge, as the 'book' really doesn't have much information covering these type of situations. The needs that occour are different and the ways to handle them depend a lot on how you are within yourself. Are the rewards greater? You know what, Im going to say not really... it's just that you become better tuned at looking for them, and you celebrate the smaller things with more intensity than what perhaps you usually would.

I still remember when Jono was first able to feed himself by himself with a spoon. No, he wasn't holding it right, no it wasn't tidy, but by joves he could do it, he was around 3.

I remember him getting on the internet and downloading and installing games on to the computer, without help, when he couldn't read, and couldn't talk enough to ask us for help, he was 5. We were amazed about this for years.

I remember the first time he came home from school with a piece of paper with his name written on it, it was crude, it wasn't all the letter, but it was his, he would have been 6. Just this year he chose a pair of sneakers to wear on his feet rather than sandals all year long, the confining space on his feet didn't worry him as much, he's now 8.

I've had more than one person comment lately how well I do with Jono, my level of patience, the way I handle him, the way I comfort him. I thank them for the comments, but that has been 5 years in the making. The person I was when I found out about his condition, is a completely different person to the one I am today... and I am grateful.

I am grateful for the lessons to my own heart about what it means to be a Mum, to any child. I am grateful to have Jono in our family, and that we have all 'had' to learn to be more patient with each other. I am grateful for all my children, and I hope they never feel like we 'play' favourites, but that we are treating each one as individuals. I am grateful for my husband, and for his family with their unity and the complete acceptance and love they have for us. I am grateful for my family, my Mother and my brother and the amazing childhood and great childhood memories I have with them.

And I am grateful for my Mum, and the positive heart she always taught me to have, the acceptance of my self and the 'healthy ego', to do more, to try more, to be different and to not be afraid of it. I so hope I can impart that on my children.

So, Happy Mothers Day, to all Mums! May you celebrate your motherhood, in all it's 'glory' and be a better person because of it.

I have to share this, I found it this morning and it's just inspired me so much, I feel it's relevant to every child, to have a mother with this kind of heart, and if you aren't that mother yet, give your children time, they are working on it :)

A PERFECTLY BEAUTIFUL SON

A little boy was feeling sad. He had been born with a disability that made him walk, talk, and move differently from other children. The little boy was sad because some of the kids in the neighborhood had been making fun of him. His mother took him by the hand and led him to the full-length mirror she kept in her bedroom.

“I’m crippled and useless. The kids say I am.”

“You’re my perfectly beautiful son.”

“Mommy, how can you say that when you know how I look?”

“You’re my perfectly beautiful son. You look like your daddy. You’re lucky, my pet. He’s handsome and strong. Can’t you see? You belong. Be proud, my beautiful son.”

“My feet drag on the ground. I fall down all the time.”

“You’re my perfectly beautiful son. And when you fall down, you get right back up. You’ve never stayed down and I know you won’t now. Get up, my beautiful son.” ... continues

You can read the rest here, at the Baltimore Family Examiner.