At School they have a little fish tank with a goldfish in it. This morning they told me how the kids have all done really well with it, they take turns feeding it, and they have all gotten past the stage of trying to get the fish out of the tank to hold/look at it.
This afternoon... I turned up to a boy in angst and tears, they said he was upset coz he wasn't allowed to have the fish. He couldn't cope with leaving so we tried to forcibly carry him to the car, he dropped to the ground and lay on the path for a while, then we did pick him up and carry him. We got him to the car but then he couldn't sit in the seat.
After about 3-4 minutes with him collapsed on the floor wringing his fingers and mine, and completely unable to listen, I dragged a seatbelt across him as best I could and went for home. After all it's only 700metres from school.
We got home and he couldn't get out of the car, so I had to forcibly carry him again, though he didn't struggle quite so badly this time. After getting in the gate he wandered around the yard with his hands over his ears for a few moments, then came to the gate and cried "Open, open, open." He really really wanted the fish.
I got him upstairs and into the shower for a bit of relax and desensitize. He's stopped crying, and seems a bit calmer.. I'll see how he is after I get him out, I'm sure he'll be ok in a bit of time, it's just heart-wrenching when he's so upset and there really is not a thing I can do.
This is the biggest meltdown he's had all year, he is tired, he did eat wrong foods on the weekend with the Birthday party he went to, but this is the first time in 6 months where he's lost it so completely. Poor boy, if only he could express what it is that is causing the pain, we could do more about it.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Movieworld!
Well there was a long weekend and we haven't gone away or done anything major as a family since Cairns... which was September, so we decided to take advantage of the extra day off and go to Movieworld.
It was a fantastic day out, and everyone really enjoyed themselves.
We started the day with Daniel and Daddy on the Spooky Rollercoaster, this may not have been the greatest idea, Daniel got off in absolute tears he was sooo scared by it all. While waiting Jono, Sarah and I played around on an old horse drawn cart, I sat up the front and Jono just wanted to sit on my legs, in the sun, and hold my hand... it was lovely.
The next ride was the wild west one.. all in a boat river ride, through some dark areas, some sections were backwards, and the end of it a long slide down into water... all 3 kids were crying on this one. During the ride Jono got very scared and wanted to get out, but he let me keep him in, and then put his head down on the bar in front and just screamed and cried. When it ended he was desperate to get off, and after we hit land he collapsed in a pile of tears on the ground... not angry, just... well.. terrified.
We stopped for a snack and gave everyone a chance to calm down then went to the kiddie rides. Sarah and Daniel were thrilled and I went with them on a ride, but Jono didn't like the idea at all.. he watched a slow, level train do it laps for a while, then we had Daniel and Sarah queue up for it. Once they got off, and seemed to be happy about the ride.. Jono was queuing at the gate.
He had a go on that, then a pirate ship style ride.. 3 times, then we went to see a show. We came back to the kiddie area, and Daniel had a go with Sarah and Daddy on the Rollercoaster. Daniel and I went to Lethal Weapon earlier, and I told him 'When you are scared, really scream loud and chase the fear away'... but we couldn't go on it coz he's not quite tall enough yet. So when he was on the kiddie coaster he remembered this and screamed his heart out... and LOVED it, he came off with such joy and wanted to go again. Sarah, was in another pile of tears, it was too scary for her.
After that I took Jono and Sarah on the train again and the pirate ship.. I let them ride by themselves on the ship, and Jono was a bit scared at first, but I made sure he could see me and he handled himself really well.
The last thing of the day was the Shrek show, Jono couldn't handle going in there.. and he did that very clearly every time something like that freaked him out, he just grabbed me or Daddy's hand and forcibly pushed in the other direction.. not desperate, just determined. So Jono and I went shopping on the main street while the others saw the show.
An amazing day, everyone really enjoyed themselves and we came home exhausted... school the next day was a bit of a challenge, mainly getting people out of bed. I think we may get a season pass for there for Christmas and go a few times, so we can go when it's not such a big day and take the time that suits us :)
It was a fantastic day out, and everyone really enjoyed themselves.
We started the day with Daniel and Daddy on the Spooky Rollercoaster, this may not have been the greatest idea, Daniel got off in absolute tears he was sooo scared by it all. While waiting Jono, Sarah and I played around on an old horse drawn cart, I sat up the front and Jono just wanted to sit on my legs, in the sun, and hold my hand... it was lovely.
The next ride was the wild west one.. all in a boat river ride, through some dark areas, some sections were backwards, and the end of it a long slide down into water... all 3 kids were crying on this one. During the ride Jono got very scared and wanted to get out, but he let me keep him in, and then put his head down on the bar in front and just screamed and cried. When it ended he was desperate to get off, and after we hit land he collapsed in a pile of tears on the ground... not angry, just... well.. terrified.
We stopped for a snack and gave everyone a chance to calm down then went to the kiddie rides. Sarah and Daniel were thrilled and I went with them on a ride, but Jono didn't like the idea at all.. he watched a slow, level train do it laps for a while, then we had Daniel and Sarah queue up for it. Once they got off, and seemed to be happy about the ride.. Jono was queuing at the gate.
He had a go on that, then a pirate ship style ride.. 3 times, then we went to see a show. We came back to the kiddie area, and Daniel had a go with Sarah and Daddy on the Rollercoaster. Daniel and I went to Lethal Weapon earlier, and I told him 'When you are scared, really scream loud and chase the fear away'... but we couldn't go on it coz he's not quite tall enough yet. So when he was on the kiddie coaster he remembered this and screamed his heart out... and LOVED it, he came off with such joy and wanted to go again. Sarah, was in another pile of tears, it was too scary for her.
After that I took Jono and Sarah on the train again and the pirate ship.. I let them ride by themselves on the ship, and Jono was a bit scared at first, but I made sure he could see me and he handled himself really well.
The last thing of the day was the Shrek show, Jono couldn't handle going in there.. and he did that very clearly every time something like that freaked him out, he just grabbed me or Daddy's hand and forcibly pushed in the other direction.. not desperate, just determined. So Jono and I went shopping on the main street while the others saw the show.
An amazing day, everyone really enjoyed themselves and we came home exhausted... school the next day was a bit of a challenge, mainly getting people out of bed. I think we may get a season pass for there for Christmas and go a few times, so we can go when it's not such a big day and take the time that suits us :)
School is a great success
Choosing for Jono to go to Special School was definitely something difficult, but it has well and truly paid off. We are still waiting for words to bloom, but he makes his intentions known better than before, and is picking up body language a little better.
He really enjoys himself there and has made a few friends... or at least he has peers who know his world. We've had one of the boys over for a play day with his Mum and Dad, Jono and his classmate didn't really play together very much, but it was great for us to see another child in similar circumstance and be able to speak to parents who understand.
We have been invited to a birthday party with one of the other boys this wekend, and that is something special as well.
I've had a couple of clashes with his teacher, but we've spoken about it more in depth and have a common ground now. She'll make a quick statement about a behavior that she sees as important to work on for his capacity for acceptance and social comprehension for both him and other people... I take it personally, thinking.. you're the teacher... teach.. but after talking it through I see where she is coming from and how we can work on it at home. It really is a 2 part process, if we are all walking on common ground it makes a difference.
He really enjoys himself there and has made a few friends... or at least he has peers who know his world. We've had one of the boys over for a play day with his Mum and Dad, Jono and his classmate didn't really play together very much, but it was great for us to see another child in similar circumstance and be able to speak to parents who understand.
We have been invited to a birthday party with one of the other boys this wekend, and that is something special as well.
I've had a couple of clashes with his teacher, but we've spoken about it more in depth and have a common ground now. She'll make a quick statement about a behavior that she sees as important to work on for his capacity for acceptance and social comprehension for both him and other people... I take it personally, thinking.. you're the teacher... teach.. but after talking it through I see where she is coming from and how we can work on it at home. It really is a 2 part process, if we are all walking on common ground it makes a difference.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
School Dramas
So, 2 weeks before the end of School last year, the special education unit asks me to come in to discuss what will work best with the funding and teachers they have for Jonathan for Grade 1.
They explain that the government supplies 1 teacher aide for 5 hours per week for each child with special needs. If they apply for more hours they can get an extra 2... or something like that. So out of 5 school days Jono was able to receive 1 day of support.
Then we discussed Jono arriving at school a little later, and they said that he would be able to stay up until first lunch... so around 2 hours a day.
Frustration is a good word for how I felt about this.
I then went to the Special School across the road and talked to them, they said that their would definitely be a spot for Jono if he was eligible, but to be eligible he needed to be Intellectually Impaired. 'Great - another label' was my thoughts.
Back to the school guidance officer, and they said the process to get a child who is untestable qualified for special school takes about 2 months. and as school is ending in 2 weeks, its unlikely they will be able to sort this before next year.
Next stop, our paediatrician, and an assessment from them with a letter recommending them to go to the special school.
After that, back to the guidance officer who calls in their supervisor and talks to the principal of the special school.
Then we arrange an appointment with all parties to see Jono in his class environment and how he interacts with other children and his capacity for mainstream school.
Say it with me.... Tearing my hair out!!!!
So, in this narrow timeframe, there was a heck of a lot to organise, and I just wanted to know where he could go and where was best for him, and I didn't want to label him as I didn't know what adverse effects that label may have for his future endeavors, as well as the stigma it may carry. There where a lot of tears and trials in getting this organised.
Then, on the second last day of school we met with the area supervisor. When she came her first question was... where do the parents want him to go? The absolute relief of dealing with someone who was willing to work with us on what's best for our child was just... so hard to put into words.
There were many tears along the way, feelings of inadequacy, and just the short time span. But we got it organized, he is in Special School now, and thriving. The teachers are great, if he's 30 min late because he didn't want to wear his shirt this morning and took some extra time to resolve it... they don't mind. If its swimming day and putting shoes on when you wear swimmers doesn't make sense... that's ok.
It's just freedom, and a chance for him to grow and learn at the pace he is able.
They explain that the government supplies 1 teacher aide for 5 hours per week for each child with special needs. If they apply for more hours they can get an extra 2... or something like that. So out of 5 school days Jono was able to receive 1 day of support.
Then we discussed Jono arriving at school a little later, and they said that he would be able to stay up until first lunch... so around 2 hours a day.
Frustration is a good word for how I felt about this.
I then went to the Special School across the road and talked to them, they said that their would definitely be a spot for Jono if he was eligible, but to be eligible he needed to be Intellectually Impaired. 'Great - another label' was my thoughts.
Back to the school guidance officer, and they said the process to get a child who is untestable qualified for special school takes about 2 months. and as school is ending in 2 weeks, its unlikely they will be able to sort this before next year.
Next stop, our paediatrician, and an assessment from them with a letter recommending them to go to the special school.
After that, back to the guidance officer who calls in their supervisor and talks to the principal of the special school.
Then we arrange an appointment with all parties to see Jono in his class environment and how he interacts with other children and his capacity for mainstream school.
Say it with me.... Tearing my hair out!!!!
So, in this narrow timeframe, there was a heck of a lot to organise, and I just wanted to know where he could go and where was best for him, and I didn't want to label him as I didn't know what adverse effects that label may have for his future endeavors, as well as the stigma it may carry. There where a lot of tears and trials in getting this organised.
Then, on the second last day of school we met with the area supervisor. When she came her first question was... where do the parents want him to go? The absolute relief of dealing with someone who was willing to work with us on what's best for our child was just... so hard to put into words.
There were many tears along the way, feelings of inadequacy, and just the short time span. But we got it organized, he is in Special School now, and thriving. The teachers are great, if he's 30 min late because he didn't want to wear his shirt this morning and took some extra time to resolve it... they don't mind. If its swimming day and putting shoes on when you wear swimmers doesn't make sense... that's ok.
It's just freedom, and a chance for him to grow and learn at the pace he is able.
So, on our holiday
Which was a while ago now >.< Life gets busy :)
We drove the 1700km's to Cairns with all three kids in the car, and it was fun, we took 3 days up and 2 days back and stayed in hotels. It really was an adventure, we are just lucky that our kids enjoy traveling I think.
We stayed with Grandpa for about 8 days, all the kids piled in with us, and we drove each other nuts. Jonathan's lack of concern for special things was a minor stress to Grandpa, and the lack of things for the kids to do at his house was a minor stress to us. We did go out a lot, but Sarah still needed a daytime nap, so it took a bit of organization. I'm glad we drove up because then we had a car to drive around as we wanted.
We took all the kids to Kuranda, and decided to drive up as we thought they would cope better. On the way back Sarah and I rode the Skyrail, while Daddy took the boys on an army duck. Jono spent the entire trip with his hands over his ears for the noise, but seemed to enjoy himself.
We visited the Butterfly farm, and all the kids really enjoyed it, Jono was just prancing up and down the paths, while Daniel had a butterfly attach it self to his shirt for the entire tour. Then we also visited the Bird Sanctuary with these amazing Macaws that you could hand feed near the froont... these really grabbed Jono's attention, and he constantly wanted to feed them, even when they lost interest. It really was a wonderful time.
We visited quite a few play spaces while we were there, and the local Golden Arches saw us a bit. Once we moved into caravan parks we spent a lot of time in their playground and pool, as well as just chilling in front of the TV with the lego's. It really was just a great time away from home. We were also very glad to get back home at the end of it and have a little more space and 'routine'.
We drove the 1700km's to Cairns with all three kids in the car, and it was fun, we took 3 days up and 2 days back and stayed in hotels. It really was an adventure, we are just lucky that our kids enjoy traveling I think.
We stayed with Grandpa for about 8 days, all the kids piled in with us, and we drove each other nuts. Jonathan's lack of concern for special things was a minor stress to Grandpa, and the lack of things for the kids to do at his house was a minor stress to us. We did go out a lot, but Sarah still needed a daytime nap, so it took a bit of organization. I'm glad we drove up because then we had a car to drive around as we wanted.
We took all the kids to Kuranda, and decided to drive up as we thought they would cope better. On the way back Sarah and I rode the Skyrail, while Daddy took the boys on an army duck. Jono spent the entire trip with his hands over his ears for the noise, but seemed to enjoy himself.
We visited the Butterfly farm, and all the kids really enjoyed it, Jono was just prancing up and down the paths, while Daniel had a butterfly attach it self to his shirt for the entire tour. Then we also visited the Bird Sanctuary with these amazing Macaws that you could hand feed near the froont... these really grabbed Jono's attention, and he constantly wanted to feed them, even when they lost interest. It really was a wonderful time.
We visited quite a few play spaces while we were there, and the local Golden Arches saw us a bit. Once we moved into caravan parks we spent a lot of time in their playground and pool, as well as just chilling in front of the TV with the lego's. It really was just a great time away from home. We were also very glad to get back home at the end of it and have a little more space and 'routine'.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Well... we got busy...
We went away to Cairns (the top end of Australia) for a holiday in September, and I had no Internet access... so the blog got put on hold :)
We had a great 3 wks, Jono was very forthcoming to people in the swimming pool, and jumped wholeheartedly onto complete strangers backs, fortunately they were very relaxed up there and it didn't cause issues. There was also a moment where some kids were running races and tried to get Jono to join in, I explained he was Autistic and didn't understand but thanked them for trying to include him, two minutes later they were getting him to do high fives with them.
Sarah and Daniel also enjoyed being away from home, and loved Grandpa's dog. We all had a really good time, and I think Jono only melted down once or twice. We drove the whole way there and back 1700km's, with the three kids, and they all coped really well... Rob and I were quite amazed.
Towards the end of the year, Jono plateaued, he didn't really progress in speech or school, and I think he knew school was finishing as he got more difficult to direct. The last two weeks of school, I had lots of concerns and dramas about where he should go for this year, as I wanted him in special school, and he had to be intellectually impaired to be able to go. More 'labels', stress, choices, decisions, questions... it was hard, but we got through it, and he is now in Grade one at special school.. and he is doing wonderfully! More on that later.
We also had an very interesting summer holiday, it was too long and not long enough, but we all did very well... and more on that later too. Nice to start blogging again, he is my special man, and life is busy, but good :)
We had a great 3 wks, Jono was very forthcoming to people in the swimming pool, and jumped wholeheartedly onto complete strangers backs, fortunately they were very relaxed up there and it didn't cause issues. There was also a moment where some kids were running races and tried to get Jono to join in, I explained he was Autistic and didn't understand but thanked them for trying to include him, two minutes later they were getting him to do high fives with them.
Sarah and Daniel also enjoyed being away from home, and loved Grandpa's dog. We all had a really good time, and I think Jono only melted down once or twice. We drove the whole way there and back 1700km's, with the three kids, and they all coped really well... Rob and I were quite amazed.
Towards the end of the year, Jono plateaued, he didn't really progress in speech or school, and I think he knew school was finishing as he got more difficult to direct. The last two weeks of school, I had lots of concerns and dramas about where he should go for this year, as I wanted him in special school, and he had to be intellectually impaired to be able to go. More 'labels', stress, choices, decisions, questions... it was hard, but we got through it, and he is now in Grade one at special school.. and he is doing wonderfully! More on that later.
We also had an very interesting summer holiday, it was too long and not long enough, but we all did very well... and more on that later too. Nice to start blogging again, he is my special man, and life is busy, but good :)
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Strange Hurts
Last Sunday at Church, he needed to go to the toilet before church started. Nothing unusual in this, he knows where the toilets are, he can toilet himself quite well now... so off he goes.
A few minutes later the cries of frustration start ringing out... so I head in to see whats wrong. He's standing at the bowl, but nothing is coming out... I'm not sure if he has allready done anything, but he is very distressed.
I went and got hubby to see if he could encourage him to go... a few minutes later I head back and nothing has still happened, and he is still standing there frustrated. Daddy has to do some things, so he heads out.
30 minutes later of sitting on the toilet floor next to my distressed crying son, I am thinking to myself... why do I bother going out, why bother trying to get to church, if I spend the time in the toilet there is no point in coming... WHY is my son Autistic?!?!?
There are moments of clarity I get about our situation. I've heard Autism called 'and invisible disability'... and they are right... I can't 'see' anything wrong with this child... yet there is so much 'wrong'. The brain synapses don't connect in the usual fashion, the world around him is a foreign and sometimes scary place, seemingly simple things can get out of control easily. Yet it is no-one's 'fault' not his, not ours.
It just is.
And yet, it is not the sole controlling factor of our lives... and I should not let it be in that place, even if on some days it seems as though it is.
A few minutes later the cries of frustration start ringing out... so I head in to see whats wrong. He's standing at the bowl, but nothing is coming out... I'm not sure if he has allready done anything, but he is very distressed.
I went and got hubby to see if he could encourage him to go... a few minutes later I head back and nothing has still happened, and he is still standing there frustrated. Daddy has to do some things, so he heads out.
30 minutes later of sitting on the toilet floor next to my distressed crying son, I am thinking to myself... why do I bother going out, why bother trying to get to church, if I spend the time in the toilet there is no point in coming... WHY is my son Autistic?!?!?
There are moments of clarity I get about our situation. I've heard Autism called 'and invisible disability'... and they are right... I can't 'see' anything wrong with this child... yet there is so much 'wrong'. The brain synapses don't connect in the usual fashion, the world around him is a foreign and sometimes scary place, seemingly simple things can get out of control easily. Yet it is no-one's 'fault' not his, not ours.
It just is.
And yet, it is not the sole controlling factor of our lives... and I should not let it be in that place, even if on some days it seems as though it is.
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