I started this blog with the thought of getting some more people I could talk to who perhaps understood some of what I was facing and going through with having a special boy... and to give me an outlet to be able to talk about what I feel.
Since starting this I have found people near me in physical location, as well as people I have known for a while in different places. I play an on-line computer game, which is fantasty based, and have been a pink-haired gnome for a while in one of the locations, 2 of the players in that location, while across the world, also have kids who have either asperger's or autism.
I have also had a friend at church who has a friend who has a child who is autistic get in touch with me this last week, and her little girl is a year older than Jonathan, but she 'knows'where I am coming from about stuff. I have also started doing step classes at the gym, and just found out that the trainer there has a boy who has aspergers, who is 11 years old... and who's name is also Jonathan.
Then... one of his teacher's aides at school has a son who has aspergers, and he is 18... and one of my long-term friends has a boy who is great friends with our older boy who is starting down the diagnosis trial for apergers. I truly am amazed at just how many people there are around me who actually have some understanding of where I am at, and that we can be a support for each other.
The most encouraging story for me out of these recent people is Jono's teacher aide. She was telling me things she does to help her boy to be able to calmly and appropriately behave and interact, and counting seemed to help a lot, and she counts with Jono... eg, Sit on the mat ...1 ... Cross your legs ... 2 ... and rarely does she need to go to 3, but 3 is him getting taken outside and missing out on the class activity.
But anyway... her son, who is 18, at Jono's age was also pretty much completely non-verbal, just like Jono and had did lots of rocking, where Jono is more a pacer and a flapper... is now a university student doing a double degree in IT and secondary teaching, then he plans to do a degree in Law. May I just say... WOW!! What a great hope and vision for Jono's possible future.
I am also a little stunned by all these people at this particular time of my life, but I am sure it is because I am ready. I have grieved, I have turned to chocolate for comfort (and gained 20kg's), I have gone through disbelief, shock, anger, denial, guilt and so on... and on some days those feelings can come back, but for the most part, I am moving forward, I am gaining confidence about Jono's abilities, and realising more and more a lot of it is really not in my hands anyway. One day at a time, being grateful for what I have.
I have a 6 year old with Aspergers also. If you ever need to talk drop me a line
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